February 6, 2005

  • TOPIC: A RARE PERSONAL CONFLICT


    After reading the beginning of my book which is critical of Wash U., another blogger had this comment for me:


    would you really like to know why I would love to scream at you?  (Not that you’ll ever read this)


    Because you are a CHEATER.  You are a LAZY BUM who should have been expelled from WashU, but weren’t because they like to keep their graduation rate as high as possible.  You are an unaccountable jerk who blames society for your own shortcomings and laziness.  Many people I know were able to complete their WU education in four years and participate in extra-curriculars as much as they might have hated some of their classes.  Even myself (and I am far from one of the best students I know), I managed to get out in four years with two majors, 150 credit hours, and a 3.0.  I also studied overseas for a semester and both wrote for and served as treasurer for the Washington Witness.  Oh, and I held a work-study position too and generally attended church.  I don’t have a lot of sympathy for underachievers who complain about having to study 15 hours a week and how it’s so hard and boring that they feel driven to plagiarize (and to plagiarize so blatantly that the professor didn’t even have to read their paper to know it was from a different year) and still feel hopeful they’ll be let off easy.  You are a common cheater, and, like I say, you should have been expelled.  And as for your writing, well, let’s say I’m not impressed.  Had I known the standards for writing at WU were significantly lower than those at my high school, I’d have chosen somewhere else for my undergraduate education. 


    So yes, Dan, I would like to scream at you because you are a spoiled, lazy, slacking underachiever who blames the world for your inadequacy.  In fact in some ways it would appear that I just did. 


    Here was my response on her site:






    Thanks for responding, (and I hope the others who commented get to read this, because there’s a long story behind the post on this site),


    Before I tell you more about myself, I’ll respond to your comments.  First of all, you gave me two labels.  You said I was lazy, and you said I had shortcomings.  You also called me spoiled, an underachiever, and inadequate.  I’m assuming you made those judgements after reading the link to my book (an old link which was mostly unedited).  You also accused me of being a poor writer.


    Probably the biggest misunderstanding you have of me is that I plagiarized because I thought school was hard.  I did think school was boring, not hard.  There’s a difference.  I don’t shy away from doing things that are hard.  In fact…you might be surprised by how similar our work ethics are.  I also studied abroad, I also graduated in 4 years, I also had a 3.0 gpa, I also did extra-curriculars (3-years of mock trial, we finished 7th in the nation my sophomore year), I was freshman class treasurer, and I wrote several articles for StudLife my senior year (you can do a search on that) and I’ve written several as an alumni.  Since college I’ve self-published a book, I promoted it myself this fall, including at Wash U. for a small bit. 


    Career wise, I’m an Outward Bound instructor.  I did a 45-day Outward Bound course after college, I worked for Outward Bound South Africa for 3-months, and worked on two 21-day courses, where I spent most days hiking as much as 15-miles a day with 50 pounds on my back. 


    So…I hope you can see that my handing in a friends’ paper my senior year of college was not out of laziness, or an inability to do the work.  As you said, you had many friends who hated some of their classes.  Well…I hated this class, and so I decided that it was of no personal value for me to write this paper.  You may think that I am still (insert adjective here) for simply breaking the rules, and not writing the paper regardless of whether or not I wanted to write it, but, as someone with strong beliefs in what education is supposed to be, that simply didn’t fit my beliefs.  Education is supposed to be enjoyable and personally meaningful.  If it isn’t, it tends to be a waste of everyone’s time.  I jumped through the hoops for 3 1/2 years, took tests, wrote papers, even got good grades.  You wouldn’t be able to distinguish me from just about any other Wash U. student.  But…I’m not the type of person who learns best from listening to a lecture, I learn more through experience or through learning something that has some relevance to the real world (as do most people I’ve spoken to), so…I finally reached a point where I no longer felt obligated to follow the rules of traditional education (and I’m critical of Wash U. because there’s other types of colleges and universities that have different teaching practices, and, had I gone to one of those schools which I’ve only recently learned about, I wouldn’t have run into these same problems.  I actually think a lot of students would benefit from a different form of education.  Not surprisingly, a handful of Wash U. deans and professors also agree with this).


    I agree that there’s certain students who don’t do so well in school, or even make bad decisions in school, who you won’t have sympathy for.  I think the more you find out about me personally and my story, the less you’ll look at me in that way.  I find that people are often quick to judge, and quick to blame the individual.  I think you should really think about not only your judgement of me, but the fact that you made those conclusions after knowing absolutely nothing about me beyond the little bit of my book that you read.  Often, there is a mixture of blame between the individual and the school/society.  I have taken 100% responsibility for failing my courses.  I went to summer school, made up the work, and graduated.  If you want to continue to focus on my wrongdoing and continue to label me so many things, you may.  But…if you want to understand my story, and look at Wash U. with a critical eye as I have begun to do, I think you will begin to see things in ways you never thought. 

Comments (6)

  • heya dan, i’m drunk but i also need some motivation. your outward bound program sounds interesting, but i am not the wealthiest of individuals. i came back from OZ only to be beaten into submission all over again by washu curriculum over and above work to pay the bills and generally real life enjoyment. i don’t even have time to think anymore… *sigh* all i want is to find what i enjoy, do it until i find something else i enjoy more, and have a female partner in crime. is that so much to ask?

  • Always realize that when you challenge something someone has decided was their “great work,” they are often going to jump into a vicious attack position. The above commenter, I’m very sure, proudly drives around with a Washington University sticker on the back of their car, and is certain they are “among America’s elite” for having attended. That’s basic to their self-image at this moment in their life. Institutions actually work to breed to this attitude because it assures compliance and blocks threats of change. (The Soviets were very good at this)

    So, by questioning the education offered by WU, you challenge this person’s “sense of self.” It is not the criticism aimed at you that bothers me (that’s reflex), it’s the complete lack of self-reflection or analysis.

  • papa pio himself?!?!?!?

  • I must say that I am impressed with your thoughts and reaction to this person that didn’t stop to think about the reasons why you did what you did. Not that I condone it, but I understand the feeling when you have had enough of something, and the only way you feel you have left is to screw the system that you don’t beleive in. All my life I have been the good student, the perfect pupil, and the one that could never do wrong. I always thought that this was the production of carefully guarded and spotless reputation. I did whatever it was was asked of me, never questioned authority, and accepted the answers fed to me as truths. As I have gotten older, I have found through some difficult incidents, that this spotless reputation is not worth the ignorance that accompanies it. You evidently have done some soul-searching since then, and who is to say that you have not learned more because of it, than if you had never done it in the first place? I can also say, from reading all of the research that yo do, that you are in love with learning. You don’t do it for a grade, or to look more intelligent, or to uphold a reputation. You do it for the only reason that it should happen in the first place, and I think that holds far greater weight.

  • Boredom does not validate cheating.  Beyond the simple moral issues associated with cheating, your plagarism insulted not only the professor (but who cares about that because that was afterall the point, right?) but also the rest of us who actually wrote the paper.  Interested or not we took the time, made the effort and may have even learned something.  But you are just better than all the rest.  After all, you wrote a book, you published it, and you are an Outward Bound instructor!  But Dan, let me ask you this…. who paid for your book to be published?  who paid for you to fly to St. Louis to promote your book?  Who paid for you to take the Outward Bound Instructor course? and… whose couch are you sleeping on now?  I suppose that writing a book about the faults of the system is a great way to validate your actions and ease your guilt.

  • Thanks for your response…i hope you take the time to read my reply:

    I’m not really a philosopher, so I’m not going to argue whether or not what I did was immoral.  Was it the smart thing to do…probably not.  Was it wrong?  Well…i’m not really going to say what I did was right.  But, I think there is a context involved beyond simply viewing my action as immoral (in the same way that a poor person stealing bread to avoid starving would have to be examined differently from me just stealing somebody’s car).

    I think most people will make many assumptions about what i did, and why i did it.  For example, you assumed that my intent was to insult the professor.  My response is simply that it never crossed my mind that I should hand in somebody elses paper in order to insult my professor.

    The simple intent of what I did was to get a passing grade.  I thought they’d read it, give me a B, a C, anything above an F, I’d get it back, and everything would go on.  I’d pass the class, graduate college, start my life.  I can assure you my intent wasn’t even to get a good grade, it was merely to pass.  The fact that I didn’t even take the time to even read through the paper I handed in pretty much shows my mindset back then. 

    You write that what I did insulted you and everyone else who wrote the paper.  Well…you’re the first and only person who has told me they feel insulted by what I did (maybe if more people actually knew that I handed in someone elses paper 2 years ago, they’d feel insulted, i’m sure lots of people have done similar things, but i don’t think each case of plagiarism results in everyone else being disrespected).

    anyways…i do want to acknowledge that you feel insulted by what i did…and i want to question the basis for you feeling that way.  As you said…you wrote the paper legitimately (i’m curious who you are by the way, if you were in that class…you obviously can choose to remain anonymous).  As you said, you took the time, wrote the paper, and maybe learned anything.  Well…that’s the point.  The point of school is that you do work, and you get something educational out of it.  What other people do in the class does not take away from your experience. 

    One of the arguments I made to the academic integrity committee was the issue of intellectual integrity.  Clearly…my actions went against academic integrity, which is a set of morals mostly limited to the world of school and academia.  I personally believe real world morals such as not stealing are more important than the morals limited to school or games (if I was playing you in chess and moved the pieces when you weren’t looking, that would also be immoral, but, like plagiarism, i don’t think the harm is as real as we make it out to be…although I again separate cheating to get ahead,  and cheating just to get by, which is what i essentially did).

    You make a claim that i feel i’m better than the rest…i don’t know where that stems from???

    Regarding my book and lifestyle…I worked at a summer camp the last 2 years.  That money paid for my Outward Bound instructor course, that money paid for all the books I published, and that money paid for the bus I took to St. Louis, and to various other places.  I’ve been living on a very tight budget of money I’ve earned myself, and have received the support of friends letting me stay on their couches.  I rarely buy material things, my funds go mostly towards food, travel, and allowing me to do the things i’ve been doing. 

    I never felt guilty about what i did.  From the time i decided to do it, till now…i’ve felt upset mostly at the type of education system i’d been in.  The only thing i regret is i had to go to summer school, which cost me time and money, and like the course i plagiarized, i found myself in courses w/ no classroom discussion, and a general sense that i wasn’t learning anything of personal value.

    writing a book about the faults of the system was not an attempt to validate my action.  it was a book to highlight the faults of the system… as i write, i’ve moved way beyond the plagiarism experience, that’s 1% of the book, the rest is about culture, education, travel, self-help, careers, writing, lots of different things.  The plagiarism is now just a small part of a much bigger story.

    The one thing i wanted to question, was the idea of intellectual integrity.  My philosophy of education tells me that education is supposed to be meaningful.  I don’t mean to get philosophical, but i do feel that forcing students to write a paper about something they’re not interested in is immoral…or, at least, bad education.  Many educators have found that learning happense best when the student is interested in what they’re learning.  So…even though you and everyone else in the class who didn’t plagiarize can claim to be more moral than I was, if you didn’t care about the paper, if you wrote it in 2-3 days and didn’t really have any meaningful discussions about it, if you looked at the grade before you looked at the comments, if you never thought about the paper again, if you can’t remember what you learned, then i’d say the entire experience was educationally bankrupt.  I chose to not partake in that type of experience…and while my hope was to simply slide through like many people, I now see my actions as a legitimate form of protest against that form of education.  

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