December 6, 2004

• It’s this society that makes me sick
  and i can’t

  
  

                                              it

  
  

  escape

  
  

  For escape is trapped in the muck
  of life

  
  

  It’s like beer, the tasty buzz
  life is one big hangover
  expectations of the party unfulfilled

  
  

  I want to live on a commune
  friends
  company
  laughter

  
  

  HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

  
  

  

  
  

  the simple smile
  
  i have found the trap of life again
  living in an isolated home
  commuting an isolated commute
  working an isolated work
  eating an isolated eat

  
  

  My mind is too radical for the world i’m living in
  I  because i know i will discover this world
  because i can no longer be laughed at for hating the dullness of this world
  that is so full of dullness that it is laughable

  
  

  these norms I have fallen into
  are not normal
  i will not find a woman through the internet
  i will not find my exercise running on a machine
  i will not enjoy the outdoors through my memory

  
  

  Life needs to be structured around my needs
  human needs
  
  I want to be around people who think it is sick to be healthy in a world that is sick
  i want to be around people
  philosophers
  musicians
  painters
  poets
  lovers
  writers
  dreamers
  activists
  
  how can i have come so far only to feel so far from where i know i need to be
  the breaking away

  
  

   

  
  

   

  
  

   

  
  

  has begun

  
  

   

  
  

   

  
  

   

  
  

   

  
  

   

  
  

   

  
  

  Yet it is here i must be
  my focus must be on finding my culture
  for the culture i am in now is like a beer
  and i want to feel the buzz of climbing a mountain-top again
  i want to be funky and free
  and not understand myself
  and not be understood by those who know me
  because i need to continue to change
  f-a-s-t-e-r-a-n-d-f-a-s-t-e-r-a-n-d
  before i’m too old
  and i can only dream of the culture that was meant for me
  
  i am 23

  
  

  i wish i were 18

  
  

  i’m glad i’m not 27

  
  

  how can i do this?
  what will i do?
  
  This poem was inspired as I began reading the latest Adbusters magazine.  Sitting inside my friend’s apartment reading this magazine, is akin to sitting inside an apartment reading a magazine on rock climbing.  At some point, it hits you that you’re spending too much time dreaming, and not enough time living your dreams.  I don’t want to be a spectator to those who are re-defining the ways of our society.  Sure…to some extent I’m working to create change, but I know my mind is far more creative and out-of-the box than the organization I’m interning with.  and it’s eating me up a bit.  Yeah, it’s a good experience, but, i’m not finding the mentor that i want who will push my mind…who will talk crazy talk to me about the real changes that need to be discussed.  they’re doing it a little, and it’s good work they’re doing, but there’s still half-of-me that’s lacking stimulation. the side of me that wants to challenge the entire notion of the way we do education, ugh…it makes me want to puke. 

  
  

  On a happier note, i’m going to eat a cream filled cooke

  
  

  -dan

  
  

  big game for Arsenal tom.!!!!
  
  
  

  • 8:49 pm
  • 1 Comment