The last 2 night’s I’ve tried out Adam Corolla’s new late night show that’s on after the daily show.  It sucks.  He sucks.  The man show was funny, probably because it wasn’t just Corolla’s show, and because the whole point of the show was to take everything male and multiply it by 1000.  This new show is just Adam playing the role of the exaggerated male, trying to be the biggest asshole he can be.  I never really encountered many shit-head frat guys (yeah…there were some, but frats at my school don’t fit the stereotype of wild out of control college frats), but I’d imagine Adam was one of them.  I hope they take his show off and just show Daily Show repeats.  Yeah…that’s right, burn in hell Adam Corolla show.  and wipe that smug grin off your face.

So…I’ve gotten back to working out.  Joined a New York Sports Club, there’s like 1000 of these in the city.  The one i go to is actually a pretty small gym, but from the 25th floor there’s a patio w/ a wicked view of the city.  After a long day of doing nothing in an office, there’s also nothing better than sitting in a sauna, and forgetting about life for a bit. 

Last night decided to switch it up…ran at the beach a bit.  If i’m on a work-out machine, i’ll run/bike/ski for 15min. before I get tired.  But…that tired is obviously more mental, because yesturday I ran a good 40min. in the sand, with a 15min. mediation/chill out break on a jetti.

Also…began reading a book I read ages ago, “On a Pale Horse,” by Piers Anthony.  It’s a fantasy book…I’m not really into or non-into any particular genre of books, but I’m really enjoying this one again.  It’s part of a 7-part series called the Incarnations of Immortality, each book about a different character which personifies some timeless part of life.  For example, book one is about Death, and there’s also Nature, Fate, War, Good, Evil, and Time.  

The main character Zane, goes into a charm shop.  He’s broke, and his life is not going so well.  He first tries on a lovestone, which gets bright, indicating he is destined to meet his dream woman that day.  He then tries on a wealth stone, which will lead him to money wherever he goes.  He apologizes to the shop owner, but leaves because he cannot afford either.  The owner than makes a deal, to sell the wealthstone, in exchange for Zane leading the owner to this dream woman.  He agrees…and they go out on their flying carpets…suddenly, a woman’s carpet collapses, her flying spell having worn off.  The owner swoops in, and wins the woman’s heart.  He also wins her wealth, since she is a rich and powerful woman.

Zane then owns the wealthstone, which turns out to be merely a cheap metal detector, leading him to pennies and nickles.  It’s at that point, that he decides to kill himself, only to be interrupted by Death at his door, who he promptly turns the gun towards and shoots.  And so Zane obtains the role of Death, harvesting those souls that are in balance between good and evil, heaven and hell. 

As he takes on his new role, with a bit of rookie jitters, Zane encounters several situations that push his moral limits.  He begins asking himself, “do i need to kill this person or that?”  Perhaps if he just allowed someone a bit longer, they could do a bit more w/ their life.  Why did that kid have to mess around in his mothers spell cabinet?  Why did that person have to play with that fire-breathing dragon?  It’s a fun book if you ask me. 

Topic: Bill Maher, I’m Swiss

Unlike Adam Corolla, Bill Maher is a comedian and ranter that I enjoy listening to.  His recent HBO special that my friend tivo’d, was no exception.  He had some very poignant observations about society:

1) People say I’m anti-American.  That’s not the case at all…I’m simply embarassed to be an American today, there’s a difference.

2) People say, you can either have an intellectual President, or a “man of the people.”  Clinton managed to be both.  You say he wasn’t a man of the people!!!   The guy went after ugly chicks, what more do you want?

3) Can we please legalize marijuana already?  How many people have died or killed others from alcohol!!! What’s the worse thing pot has done?  It’s basically supporting the junk food economy (not really how his joke went…but did a good rant on drugs)

ice cold beer……

So I wasn’t really serious in my last post…just felt like having fun w/ freedom of speech and all that, see what kind of reactions I’d get.  I haven’t looked too much into this, but apparently bloggers in China can’t write the words “democracy” or “falun gang,” (the banned spiritual practice).  They’ve programmed everything so the words just scramble if you type them…creepy shit. 

So…I saw Johnny Clegg last night.  Pretty decent show, the guy is probably close to 50 now.  Their stage presence felt more like a concert you’d see at a summer camp, full of lame yet funny choreographed dance moves, constant speaker feedback, and lighting that occassionally blinded the audience.  Most of his songs were written in the ’80′s and earlier and that’s the music that about 200 people paid to hear.  His back-up singer was a black woman who had a butt so big it could substitue as a bar counter. 

One of his songs was written about a former bandmember who was assinated in ’92 as a freedom fighter, trying to end apartheid.  

Just found out a friend who graduated my college this past May is heading up to Alaska w/ her boyfriend today for about a month.  Then plans to head back to St. Louis.  I think life is a lot about momentum, and her plan is to keep that momentum from college-life going.  I’m starting to build a bit of momentum of my own, settling in comfortably to my job which entails 8 hours in a chair in front of a computer, about 1-2 hours of which I’m either answering a phone, mailing things out, and other assorted tasks.  Nice and comfy…what more could I want. 

I’m going to see Johnny Clegg tonight…sweet.

Politics is meaningless but still mildly entertaining…

I hope there’s another terrorist attack in the States…I mean, I hope that nobody I know or nobody who is known by somebody I know, gets hurt.  That way, it’ll be like most news, it won’t really affect me personally, but it’ll sure as hell make life interesting again.  George Carlin did a bit on this…the way we’re captivated by video footage of bad things happen.  Now that the tsunami and its effects are out of site, out of mind, let me say, “Man…what bitchin’ waves those were.  Can you believe the way it swallowed everything up, unreal, badass shit.”  I didn’t even read about that plane thing in Toronto, but that seemed pretty sweet too. 

It’s been a while since a live drama has played out.  Like the OJ chase during the NBA playoffs, the Bay area quake during the ’89 playoffs I think it was.  I mean, people and things get blown up and killed every day, but I want the shit that’ll get me out of work early so I can crowd around a tv in a bar. 

I’m tired of settling for Hall of Famers being caught using steroids.  I still can’t figure out why the world of baseball and government should ever mix.  It’s a friggin’ game.  Can you imagine if WWF wrestling were treated like baseball, and Hulk Hogan and other classic wrestlers had their championship belts stripped from them from their fake sport, because they’re all juiced up.  And all the normal WWF drama would suddenly play out on the White House steps, with Hulk Hogan and the Macho Man Randy Savage, once good friends, suddenly duking it out, like Jose Conseco ratting out his former buddies.

Tuesday: the day after Monday

After work, came home, inhaled some food, drove to Jones Beach.  I am officially a loser w/ no friends who goes to the beach alone.  I fell asleep in the sand, and was awoken around 9:30pm by police lights.  Apparenlty, the sand is closed after the sun goes down.  The fuckin’ sand!!!  Yet one more example to toss on the already high pile of shit that is my current life.  At one point in time, I got paid to sleep on the beach, and to supervise other people sleeping on a beach. 

I probably could have gone back after the cops drove away.  This hispanic couple was also pretty upset, they decided to resume their cozy spot on the lifeguard chair.  As for me, w/ my luck, I’d have gotten a ticket, or gotten arrested.  And last week, I was out w/ some friends in Bryant Park in NYC, and my friend brings out a 6-pack in a bag.  We’re enjoying the Fri. afternoon buzz, but constantly on edge for the worthless park patrol.

My sister, who is single, ran into a friend of hers who said she had the perfect guy for her.  Turned out it was a family friend of ours.  He’s tall, atheltic, and doing very well for himself as a dentist.  Suddenly, I was envious.  I wish I was a successful dentist!  I want to be doing well for myself.  I want to make my parents proud, and their friends proud…

…but, I don’t think I was quite built like that.  I went to college as a business major, and somehow that ambiton to become rich and successful managing money fell through.  I thought about becoming a lawyer, but somehow that ambition to become rich and successful arguing cases fell through.  All my beliefs about adulthood are stuck w/ me from when I was a child, even the belief that I’ll become an academically minded person.

But in reality…all I crave is natural beauty, physical activity (settling for working out in a gym doesn’t cut it), a communal setting w/ interesting people of all different backgrounds,

Imagine you’re a deer, you’re drinking some cool crisp water with your little dear lips…then, BANG, a fuckin’ bullet rips your head open, and splatters your brain everywhere.  Now…are you gonna give a shit what color pants the mother-fucker who shot you was wearing!

Saw Wonka last night…how creepy amazing was Johnny Depp.  That was a big improvement from Gene Wilder, although the oompa-loompas left something to be desired.  I hoped they’d take some of the retro-ness from the original.  They also left out the “Burp Charlie, Burp” scene, and added in some Wonka family shots.

So…the only thing making life worth livable, is knowing that for under a grand, I could be in Israel by Wed. afternoon, exchanging my labors for life on a kibbutz.  Let see what else I can concoct.